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“The Great Flamingo Uprising”
The staunch Never Yet Melted points to this amazing story: In addition to the aviary/jungle exhibit, our zoo has several species of birds that pretty much have the run of the place. They started with a small flock of flamingos and some free-range peacocks that I’m almost certain came from my old...
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Magicman
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M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
A businessman visiting a large city stopped in at a restaurant and was very impressed with the entire operation. Service was quick, the meal was tasty and everything ran very smoothly. His waiter came over and refilled his tea glass when it was half full and he talked to him and said "I am really impressed how smoothly everything works here but one thing I noticed is all the waiters have a spoon in their pocket."
The waiter replied "Yes, we had an efficiency expert come through to help us and he noted the most commonly dropped piece of silverware is the spoon so we all carry a spoon then if a customer asks for one we don't have to make a special trip to the back to get one."
The businessman continued his meal and sure enough he dropped his spoon and waved at his waiter who came over and gave him the one out of his pocket and took the old one while the businessman finished his meal.
Later as he was eating his dessert the businessman told his waiter "Another thing I noticed is all the waiters have a string hanging out of their fly. What is up with that."
The waiter replied "Yep, that was another suggestion. By tying a string around themselves the guys don't have to touch themselves when they go to the bathroom and can avoid having to wash their hands and it is much faster."
The businessman asked "But how do you put yourself back in your fly if you don't touch yourself?"
The waiter replied "I don't know about the others but I just use my spoon."
The waiter replied "Yes, we had an efficiency expert come through to help us and he noted the most commonly dropped piece of silverware is the spoon so we all carry a spoon then if a customer asks for one we don't have to make a special trip to the back to get one."
The businessman continued his meal and sure enough he dropped his spoon and waved at his waiter who came over and gave him the one out of his pocket and took the old one while the businessman finished his meal.
Later as he was eating his dessert the businessman told his waiter "Another thing I noticed is all the waiters have a string hanging out of their fly. What is up with that."
The waiter replied "Yep, that was another suggestion. By tying a string around themselves the guys don't have to touch themselves when they go to the bathroom and can avoid having to wash their hands and it is much faster."
The businessman asked "But how do you put yourself back in your fly if you don't touch yourself?"
The waiter replied "I don't know about the others but I just use my spoon."
Bmyers
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Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Daren Todd
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Massey Ferguson 1825E, Kubota Z121S, Box blade, Rotary Cutter
Daren Todd
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Massey Ferguson 1825E, Kubota Z121S, Box blade, Rotary Cutter
i7win7
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BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
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BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Magicman
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Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Blonde in the Baptist Church ~~
An Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this
congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a
horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.
I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who
did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and
admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you
will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression."
Again all was quiet.
Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic
rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she
spoke; "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding.. I never said you
were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that
you were a Wizard under the Sheets."
The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared!
An Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this
congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a
horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.
I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who
did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and
admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you
will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression."
Again all was quiet.
Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic
rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she
spoke; "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding.. I never said you
were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that
you were a Wizard under the Sheets."
The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared!
Bmyers
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Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
The real one is probably cave art involving a spear and a Mastodon.
Bmyers
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Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
PHPaul
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B2650, Pronovost snow blower, Landpride rotary mower, Howard tiller, box blade
RCW
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BX2360, FEL, MMM, BX2750D snowblower. 1953 Minneapolis Moline ZAU
0230 is my standard. 0430 is wake up time anyway.
I hope I can get by the 1130 trip....
You wait, Ford. Someday you might join the "Parade"....
I hope I can get by the 1130 trip....
You wait, Ford. Someday you might join the "Parade"....