Daily Chuckle

[i7win7]

Earl and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing tobacco and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says, "Think I'm gonna divorce the wife... she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months."

Earl spits overboard, takes a long, slow sip of beer and says, "Better think it over... women like that are hard to find."

 

[i7win7]

Wonder if he has a comfy couch

 

[Crash277]

Wonder if he has a comfy couch
View attachment 75930

my son apparently asked to do that when i returned from a deployment... lucky for me the wife was like.. uh how about no... haha

 

[Magicman]

God is sitting in Heaven when a scientist says to Him,
"Lord, we don't need you anymore. Science has finally
figured out a way to create life out of nothing. In other
words, we can now do what you did in the 'beginning'."

"Oh, is that so? Tell me..." replies God.

"Well", says the scientist, "we can take dirt and form it
into the likeness of you and breathe life into it, thus
creating man."

God says, "Well, that's interesting. Show Me. "

So the scientist bends down to the earth and starts to mold the soil.
"Oh no, no, no..." interrupts God, "Get your own dirt."

 

[top gnome]

 

[i7win7]

Why is the US whistleblower stuck in Moscow?

Because, he's Snowden.

 

[i7win7]

 

[Magicman]

A man suffered a serious heart attack while shopping in a store. The store
clerks called 911 when they saw him collapse to the floor. The paramedics
rushed the man to the nearest hospital where he had emergency open heart bypass
surgery.

He awakened from the surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at the
Catholic Hospital he was taken to. A nun was seated next to his bed holding a
clip board loaded with several forms, and a pen. She asked him how he was
going to pay for his treatment.

"Do you have health insurance?" she asked.

He replied in a raspy voice, "No health insurance."

The nun asked, "Do you have money in the bank?"

He replied, "No money in the bank."

"Do you have a relative who could help you with the payments?" asked the
irritated nun.

He said, "I only have a spinster sister, and she is a nun."

The nun became agitated and announced loudly, "Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns
are married to God."

The patient replied, "Perfect. Send the bill to my brother-in-law."

 

[Bmyers]

 

[North Idaho Wolfman]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Magicman]

For you Glaciated guys:

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower?

Throw her a shovel.

 

[Magicman]

Wife: (Looking out the back door early in the morning one winter) Wow! It snowed 8 inches!

Me: No! It wasn't supposed to snow that much!

Wife: Well it sure did!

Me: (I got up and looked) DanG it woman! You're pulling my leg! It ain't snowed over an inch!

Wife: Really? You always told me that was 8 inches.

Me:

 

[i7win7]

 

[i7win7]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Fordtech86]

View attachment 76008

No need to spend that much on bait, could just throw a couple 10 mm sockets under there for us