Daily Chuckle

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
Corvette, when you need a fast getaway

getaway car.jpg
 

Lil Foot

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
1979 B7100DT Gear, Nissan Hanix N150-2 Excavator
May 19, 2011
7,520
2,556
113
Peoria, AZ
Looks like I'm just out of the blast radius. :)
 

Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,517
7,589
113
81
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
Pappy asks Little Johnny walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya going boy?"
the Johnny smiled and replied, "I'm a going courting Peggy Sue."
The Father said, "When I went a courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern."
"Sure Pa, I know," Johnny said, " and look what you got!"
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
Someone's got real grilling skills

manly grill.jpeg
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
How men vacation and unwind
weekender.jpeg
 

Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,517
7,589
113
81
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
A carload of women were traveling along a country road and spotted a blonde lady out in the middle of a plowed field rowing a boat. They stopped and the driver, another blonde, said "That's disgusting and just gives all of us blondes a bad name. I've got a good mind to swim out there a give her a piece of my mind!"
 

Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,517
7,589
113
81
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
An old backwoods lady riding on the train for the first time in her life and she had to go to the bathroom so she asked the conductor where the "outhouse" was. The conductor took her to the bathroom. She looked down and saw the rails and cross ties passing below while the train was moving and she told the conductor "I ain't using that thing." He asked her "Why not?". She replied "Because I figure about the time I sit on that thing the guy driving this train will run it over a brier patch!"
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
The penalty for bigamy

Two mothers-in-law
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
Kids used to hang out at the mall, now you'll find'em at the charging station
charging station.jpg
 

Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,517
7,589
113
81
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
Dear wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell
you that I'm leaving you forever.
I've been a good man to you for 7
years & I have nothing to show for it.
These last 2 weeks have been
hell. Your boss called to tell me that you
quit your job today & that was the last straw.
Last week, you came home & didn't even
notice I had a new haircut, had
cooked your favorite meal & even
wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.
You ate in 2 minutes, & went
straight to sleep after watching all of
your soaps.
You don't tell me you love me anymore;
you don't want sex or anything
that connects us as husband & wife.
Either you're cheating on me or
you don't love me anymore; whatever!
the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband

P.S. don't try to find me. Your SISTER & I are
moving away to West Virginia together!
I took BOTH Husky saws with me too!! Have a great life!


Dear
Ex-Husband

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a
good man is a far cry from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your
constant whining & griping. Too bad that doesn't work.
I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but
the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!'
Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't
say something nice, I didn't comment.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you
must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because
I stopped eating pork 7 years ago.
About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you
because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & ; I prayed
it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50
from me that morning.
After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work
it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit
my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home
you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope
you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that
the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So
take care.

Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister
Carla was born Carl, the one with the missing tooth among other things.
I hope that's not a problem, but he/she loves Stihl's.
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
Won't say girlfriend is a bad cook, she made banana bread today
banana bread.jpg
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,379
3,982
113
Central, IL
Must live in Illinois, Land of Expensive trailer plates
auto plate.jpg

Guessing Southern Illinois
 
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Reactions: 1 user