Daily Chuckle

[seanbarr]

Is buttcheeks one word or should I spread them apart....butt cheeks??

Anybody overweight - buttcheeks
Anybody underweight - butt cheeks


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[bearbait]

Anybody overweight - buttcheeks
Anybody underweight - butt cheeks


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You guys crack me up

 

[D2Cat]

No we need to crack down on this stuff!

 

[RCW]

You guys crack me up

HA!! Gosh, I feel like I'm 10 years old again.....

You guys need to stop farting around.

 

[DustyRusty]

#1,105




Back and forth. . . .
in and out . . .
a little to the right. .
a little to the left . .

she could feel the sweat on her forehead . . .
between her breasts. .
and, trickling down the small of her back. . .
she was getting near to the end.

He was in ecstasy .
with a huge smile on his face as his wife moved. . .
forwards then backwards. .
forward then backward.

again. . .
and again. .

her heart was pounding now. . .
her face was flushed . . .
she moaned softly at first, then began to groan louder . .

finally . . .
totally exhausted . she let out a piercing scream . . . .

"OK, OK, you smug bastard, I can't parallel park. You do it!

(What were you thinking this was about???)

 

[RCW]

Anybody overweight - buttcheeks
Anybody underweight - butt cheeks

Sean - Now that right there is funny!

Holy smokes - - I had to picture those in my mind...not saying who's buttcheeks or butt cheeks I was picturing....

I need to stop farting around, too...

 

[Howling]

 

[Lil Foot]

I saw a young woman struggling to lift a two wheeler into a cart at Lowes- I asked her why she didn't just roll it out & forget the cart. She looked at me like I was a Martian, but didn't answer me. Maybe twenty minutes later, I saw her struggling to lift the two wheeler out of a cart in the parking lot. I just laughed and left her to struggle.

 

[BAP]

I saw a young woman struggling to lift a two wheeler into a cart at Lowes- I asked her why she didn't just roll it out & forget the cart. She looked at me like I was a Martian, but didn't answer me. Maybe twenty minutes later, I saw her struggling to lift the two wheeler out of a cart in the parking lot. I just laughed and left her to struggle.

She didn’t want to wear the tires out.

 

[Fordtech86]

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[skeets]

https://youtu.be/buzOdcfy918

 

[ShaunBlake]

I saw a young woman struggling to lift a two wheeler into a cart
***8942;

She didn’t want to wear the tires out.

You guys are so wrong! She explained that she didn't want to get the tires dirty–I think she saw what's on your boots!

 

[Pau7220]

If you have an "Automotive Minded" person in your life, these gift suggestions should be considered.

1. Tire Air Change Kit. This kit comes with everything you need to change the air in your tires. This highly recommended but often overlooked maintenance item is much easier now. Remember to change your air every 3000 miles or twice a year. $25

2. Blinker Fluid. You knew it existed but, WOW, is this stuff hard to find. 4 oz bottle. $12

3. Synthetic Blinker Fluid. Better yet! 4 oz bottle. $24

4. Light Bulb Filaments. Why throw away a perfectly good turn signal or stop light bulb when you can just install a new filament? Premium Filaments, made in the USA! $1 each.

5. Manifold Heat. Yes, your exhaust manifold should be HOT. If it's not, you may need this item. Sold by the pound. $3.50

6. Steering Wheel Gaskets. All SIZES available! Email for specific application. From $9.99

7. Tie Rod Tensioner. Is your tie rod limp? Tension it with T-50! $14.99

8. Alternator Batteries. (4 required, replace them all!) From $2.99

9. Fan Belt Buckles. Specify brass or chrome. Gold available special order. $14.99

10. Muffler Bearing Manual. Print version $59.95

11. Muffler Bearing Manual. CD version $49.99

12. Universal Muffler Bearing Tool Kit $105.59

13. Muffler Bearing Hi Temp Synthetic Lube (the only kind we sell!) $40.24

14. Muffler Bearings from $19.95

15. Muffler Bearing Gasket Kits from $9.99

16. Momentum (required for tackling some off road obstacles). Sold by the lb-ft/sec $0.50

17. Microsoft Windows Eliminator. If your car or truck begins to run poorly, (long time to start, frequent crashes, etc.), it's computer, (ecm, ecu, black box, etc.), may have become infected with this nasty computer virus. This product will safely remove the virus. $199

18. Mirror Image Flipper Film. Did you know that the image you see in your rear view mirrors are reversed! This is a manufacturing flaw that the auto companies have kept secret for years as the recall would cost BILLIONS!

This film can be cut and placed over any mirror to correct the image. Now you'll be able to read signs in the rear view mirror! $5 per square ft.

 

[D2Cat]

 

[Magicman]

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

 

[NHSleddog]

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

The clerk at the store asked me if I needed a bag. I told him no, I left her in the car.

 

[RCW]

Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep.

The clerk at the store asked me if I needed a bag. I told him no, I left her in the car.

That's funny stuff...

I resemble those remarks, and get myself in a little bit of trouble.

38 years in, she knows I was never a Boy Scout or Alter Boy. It's all good in jest. Sometimes my humor is lost though..

Note to self......make sure you know who doesn't look over your shoulder. You'll hear about that.......

 

[Magicman]

Absolutely in jest because in no way does grumpy describe my wife.

Actually is was on a bumper sticker.

 

[Daren Todd]

This is what happens when your wife asks you to quickly take a picture, and the camera is set to selfy with flash enabled

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[D2Cat]