Daily Chuckle

[D2Cat]

What's that saying, "Where there's a will there is a way"! Must be a direct route home without any overpasses or needing fuel at a station with a canopy!

 

[Magicman]

 

[skeets]

View attachment 63778

Mary had a little lamb
Her Father killed it dead
Now Mary takes her lamb to school
Between 2 hunks of bread

 

[Outnumbered]

View attachment 63806

You guys caught me fishing again. My wife is always asking "How many fishing rods do you need?" My answer........One more.

 

[Magicman]

A TV reporter was interviewing a marine sniper, and asked the marine what he felt when he killed terrorists. The marine shrugged his shoulders, and replied "recoil".

 

[i7win7]

a 2 legged table

 

[i7win7]

looks like a ferris buelher sequel

 

[i7win7]

think I could use some of these cards at the local mall

 

[i7win7]

A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.
Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis.'

Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response:

PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH!

 

[i7win7]

Answering Machine Message "Camptown Races":


I can't come to the telephone; doo-dah, doo-dah.
Leave your message when you hear the tone; oh, de doo-dah day.
Might be gone all night... Might be gone all day...
So leave a message when you hear the tone.
I'll call you back someday...

 

[Toyboy]

 

[ken erickson]

A female secretary was helping her new boss set up his computer and asked him what word he would like to use as a password to log in with.
Wanting to embarrass his new secretary a bit and let her know where they stood, he smugly told her to enter 'penis.'

Without blinking or saying a word, she entered the password. She then almost died laughing at the computer's response:

PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH!

That joke would have been good material for "I dont get no respect" Rodney Dangefield.

 

[i7win7]

Nice place, why is it for sale?

 

[i7win7]

How large is the neighborhood breaker?

 

[D2Cat]

Just trying to cover the debt.

Geekologie

geekologie.com

 

[i7win7]

Proud owner of new mower, wonder how he'll unload it

 

[i7win7]

 

[i7win7]

Larry, Curly and Mo construction inc.

 

[i7win7]

In the back woods, Mr. Stewart's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery.

To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, "Here, you hold this high so I can see what I'm doing." Soon, a wee baby boy was brought into the world.

"Whoa there Scotty!" said the doctor. "Don't be in a rush to put the lantern down... I think there's yet another wee one to come." Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered another little baby.

"No, no, don't be in a great hurry to be putting down that lantern, young man... It seems there's yet another one besides!" cried the doctor.

The new father scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor. "Do ye think it's the light that's attractin' them?"

 

[Magicman]