Daily Chuckle

Newlyme

Active member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 w/loader, finish mower, tiller, auger, rake. BX24 w/loader, backhoe
May 27, 2015
633
63
28
Nelson Ohio USA
Careful there! ;)
Brown Cow, Brown Horse. Both stuck in the same position.
His Girlfriend was getting a bath and he didn’t want to wait.
Our Black Horse will open the door if she wants out!
;)
 

bird dogger

Well-known member
Vendor Member

Equipment
Kubota B2650 and lots of other equipment
Feb 24, 2019
1,572
1,418
113
North Dakota
Air Show Disaster at West SWICK'S ISLAND PARK, BELLEVILLE , ONTARIO , CANADA

AIRCRAFT HITS FOUR BUILDINGS

This is tough to see. It just shows the dangers of attending these events. Amazing photo below shows great detail. The pilot at low level had no control over his aircraft. It narrowly misses a crowd gathered for the air show and slams into four buildings. One can only imagine the horror of the occupants inside those buildings.
Aircraft hit 4 buildings.png



No one was killed, but it probably scared the crap out of them!
 
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Daren Todd

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Lifetime Member

Equipment
Massey Ferguson 1825E, Kubota Z121S, Box blade, Rotary Cutter
May 18, 2014
9,082
4,567
113
Vilonia, Arkansas
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for my wife & I, for example, the other day we went into town and went into a shop. We were only in there for about 5 minutes. When we came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. We went up to him and said, 'Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?' He ignored us and continued writing the ticket. I called him a Nazi turd. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires. So my wife called him a shit-head. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote. Personally, we didn't care. We came into town by bus and the car had a Quebec plate. We try to have a little fun each day now that we're retired. It's important at our age.
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,242
3,761
113
Central, IL
Fishing club meeting
fishing club.jpg
 
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Magicman

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Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,108
6,555
113
80
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
A young farm couple, Homer and Darlene, got married and just couldn't seem to get enough lovin'. In the morning, before Homer left the house for the fields, they made love. When Homer came back from the fields, they made love. And again at bedtime, they made love.

The problem was their nooner. It took Homer a half hour to travel home and another half hour to return to the fields and he just wasn't getting enough work done. Finally Homer asked the town doctor what to do.

"Homer," said the doctor, "just take your rifle out to the field with you and when you're in the mood, fire off a shot into the air. That will be Darlene's signal to come out to you. Then you won't lose any field time."

They tried Doc's advice and it worked well for a while. Homer went back to the doctor's office.

"What's wrong?" asked the Doc. "Didn't my idea work?"

"Oh, it worked real good," said Homer. "Whenever I was in the mood, I fired off a shot like you said and Darlene'd come runnin'. We'd find a secluded place, make love, and then she'd go back home again."

"Good, Homer. So what's the problem now?" Asked the Doc.

"I ain't seen her since huntin' season started."
 
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i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,242
3,761
113
Central, IL
Pappy sees Little Johnny walking with a lantern and asks, "Where ya going boy?"
The Johnny smiled and replied, "I'm a-going courting Peggy-Sue."
The Father said, "When I went a-courtin', I didn't need me no dang lantern."
"Sure Pa, I know," Johnny said, "and look what you got!"
 

i7win7

Well-known member

Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Feb 21, 2020
3,242
3,761
113
Central, IL
The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this:
You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery," and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...
It creates a hostile work environment.
 
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Magicman

Well-known member
Lifetime Member

Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Oct 8, 2019
5,108
6,555
113
80
Brookhaven, MS
knotholesawmill.com
After 45 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening, when
the wife felt her husband fondling her in ways he hadn't in some time.

It almost tickled as his fingers started at her neck, then caressed her
shoulders and began moving down past the small of her back. Slowly he
worked his hand over her breasts, stopping just over her lower stomach.
He then proceeded to place his hand on her left inner arm, caressed
past the side of her breast again, working down her side, passing gently
over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Proceeding up her inner
thigh, he stopped at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in
the same manner on her right side, then suddenly stopped, rolled over
and became silent.

Aroused by this caressing, she asked in a loving voice, 'Honey, that
was wonderful. Why did you stop?'





'I found the remote'.
 
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