Daily Chuckle
- Thread starter skeets
- Start date
This should be attributed to Jerry Clower. What a Comedian!
"Just shoot up here amongst us. One of us got ta have some relief!"
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
Magicman
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
Magicman
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
A police officer in a small town stopped a motorist who was speeding down Main Street.
“But officer,” the man began, “I can explain”.
“Just be quiet,” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.”
“But officer, I just wanted to say.”
“And I said to keep quiet! You’re going to jail!”
A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “Lucky for you that the chief is at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.”
“Don’t count on it,” answered the fellow in the cell. “I’m the groom.”
“But officer,” the man began, “I can explain”.
“Just be quiet,” snapped the officer. “I’m going to let you cool your heels in jail until the chief gets back.”
“But officer, I just wanted to say.”
“And I said to keep quiet! You’re going to jail!”
A few hours later, the officer looked in on his prisoner and said, “Lucky for you that the chief is at his daughter’s wedding. He’ll be in a good mood when he gets back.”
“Don’t count on it,” answered the fellow in the cell. “I’m the groom.”
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
And my wife thinks I’m being sarcastic when I answer like that.
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
i7win7
Well-known member
Equipment
BX2370, B2650 grapple, tree puller, trailer mover, 3 point hoist, mower, tiller
An old country farmer had a wife who nagged him unmercifully. From
morning till night, she was always complaining about something. The only
time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule.
He tried to plow a lot. One day, when he was out plowing, his wife
brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade,
sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife
began nagging him again. Complain, nag, complain, nag - it just went
on and on. All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind
feet and caught her smack in the back of the head.
Killed her dead on the spot.
At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something
rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he
would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a
man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake
his head in disagreement.
This was so consistent, that the minister decided to ask the old farmer
about it. So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer,
and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but
always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said, 'Well, the women would come up and say something
about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod
my head in agreement.
'And what about the men?' the minister asked.
'They wanted to know if the mule was for sale.
morning till night, she was always complaining about something. The only
time he got any relief was when he was out plowing with his old mule.
He tried to plow a lot. One day, when he was out plowing, his wife
brought him lunch in the field. He drove the old mule into the shade,
sat down on a stump, and began to eat his lunch. Immediately, his wife
began nagging him again. Complain, nag, complain, nag - it just went
on and on. All of a sudden, the old mule lashed out with both hind
feet and caught her smack in the back of the head.
Killed her dead on the spot.
At the funeral several days later, the minister noticed something
rather odd. When a woman mourner would approach the old farmer, he
would listen for a minute, then nod his head in agreement; but when a
man mourner approached him, he would listen for a minute, then shake
his head in disagreement.
This was so consistent, that the minister decided to ask the old farmer
about it. So after the funeral, the minister spoke to the old farmer,
and asked him why he nodded his head and agreed with the women, but
always shook his head and disagreed with all the men.
The old farmer said, 'Well, the women would come up and say something
about how nice my wife looked, or how pretty her dress was, so I'd nod
my head in agreement.
'And what about the men?' the minister asked.
'They wanted to know if the mule was for sale.
Bmyers
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Grand L3560 with LA805 loader, EA 55" Wicked Grapple, SBX72 BB, LP 1272 mower
Took me a minute but I finally see it. Picked up the message on the cats easier than the dogs.
Daren Todd
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Massey Ferguson 1825E, Kubota Z121S, Box blade, Rotary Cutter
Once my screen darkened to go to sleep, the message jumped right out.
I did not see the dog message until I read your post...
Can only conclude they are pussy cats rather than kitties...and the dogs must be "want a be's", or whatever the term is for that today...