Daily Chuckle

[Magicman]

When I was young I was poor. After years of hard work, I am no longer young.

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[i7win7]

And the number 1 answer is???

 

[i7win7]

 

[Magicman]

If it's your sex life that's got you worried you just gotta remember:

From 20 to 30 if you're living right it's once in the morning and once at night.

From 30 to 40 if you're still living right you skip the morning and go all night.

From 40 to 50 it's now and then.

From 50 to 60 it's God knows when

From 60 to 70 if you're still inclined believe me it's all in your mind.

From 70 on it's never mind.......

 

[bearbait]

If it's your sex life that's got you worried you just gotta remember:

From 20 to 30 if you're living right it's once in the morning and once at night.

From 30 to 40 if you're still living right you skip the morning and go all night.

From 40 to 50 it's now and then.

From 50 to 60 it's God knows when

From 60 to 70 if you're still inclined believe me it's all in your mind.

From 70 on it's never mind.......

All of a sudden and I know it's not manly but I feel like I need to cry.

 

[Magicman]

I'll be 78 next month and that ain't a joke.

 

[bearbait]

True story...living in the country is great well at least here.

This morning I had to go into town for a dentist appointment and on the way in (I forgot about school going back in today) and as I drove by as they were walking down their driveways or standing at the roadside waiting for the bus every time I got close they all waved and it seemed like they were almost cheering, well kinda made me feel like a rockstar, pretty cool EHH. Made me realize how happy they were to be going back to school with their friends after being cooped up for months stuck with just their parents...IMAGINE .

Then a little way down the road on a straight stretch a couple sheep bolted across the road, jumped the fence and to put it politely they were more then a little standoffish...I'm taking it as they just don't know me.

Forgive me, I've always had trouble telling the whole truth and nothin' but the truth. First part was true

 

[bearbait]

I'll be 78 next month and that ain't a joke.

Sucks don't it.

 

[Magicman]

Sadly we don't get a "do-over".

 

[Botamon]

Still trying to figure out why they're called "The Golden Years".

Spent more of my "gold" on doctor bills in the past 3 years than I did in the previous 70!

 

[bearbait]

Sadly we don't get a "do-over".

Can you imagine if we did though...mother of God, brace you're feet, daddy's home.

 

[ctfjr]

So I go to the drug store today. I hand the pharmacist a script and ask if he can fill it. He looks at it and then looks up at me and says, "Sure I can fill it, it's Viagra".
I tell him I need the pills cut in quarters, can he do that? He hesitates a second and then he tells me the pills won't be that effective if I don't take the whole thing.
I look at him and tell him I just need enough so I don't pee on my slippers.

 

[Daren Todd]

Here's a true story that happened last week.

We've been getting quite a bit of rain. So I take Gypsy for a walk after a real gully washer of a storm.

On the walk we encounter a possum. She does not like this and starts telling the possum where to go and how to get there (barking up a storm)

I get onto her for barking, and tell her to sit. Well she sits....... Then let's out a yelp and launches straight up in the air.

She then runs back up onto the road and hides behind me

At this point I'm thinking a snake got her. So I shine the flash light down around where she sat and start searching.

I find an agitated crayfish sitting on his tail, with his claws raised.

She sat and got goosed by a crawdad

 

[i7win7]

 

[i7win7]

Unfortunately not everything is going up

 

[orange crusher]

 

[orange crusher]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Bmyers]