Daily Chuckle

[Magicman]

 

[ayak]

 

[6869704x4]

 

[Mr.Bentwrench]

View attachment 119245

Somebody will still be able to motorboat!

 

[Fordtech86]

 

[Magicman]

 

[DustyRusty]

Several years ago we headed to a nearby town to visit some relatives. I had a new car and was having fun driving fast on the twisty country roads. As we zoomed along, I noticed a three-legged chicken keeping pace with me. I slowed to get a better look at the speedster when it turned and went down a dirt road. I stopped, turned around, and followed it. After a short ride, we came upon a house with an older couple sitting on the porch and dozens of three-legged chickens in the yard. I asked them, “Are these your chickens? They’re the fastest I’ve ever seen.” The old man said, “Yep.” So I asked him where they came from, and he replied, “When the kids were younger, they always fought over the chicken legs, so we decided to breed a three-legged chicken.” I nodded and said, “Well, they are fast, but what do they taste like?” He admitted, “Not rightly sure; we never could catch one.”

 

[NorthwoodsLife]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Magicman]

 

[6869704x4]

 

[i7win7]

 

[i7win7]

 

[Magicman]

 

[dirtydeed]

View attachment 119415

I can relate to that one completely. Dakota did that and got is collar caught on the rack. When I yelled at him he backed out taking the whole bottom tray of dishes with him. That scared him even more so he took off running for the great room, dishes and all.

He was scared of the dishwasher....for about a week. After that, he started doing the pre-wash again.

 

[Magicman]

 

[Toyboy]

 

[Old_Paint]

View attachment 119525

When I was a teenager, I spent the summer after finishing high school with my paternal grandparents, whom I called "Bigmama" and "Bigdaddy", nicknames forged by the eldest cousin in our generation long before I was born. I did all sorts of odd jobs that summer with my retired grandfather ranging from painting a metal roof (cool seal) to remodeling a bathroom in my mother's house. Bigdaddy was a cabinet maker and carpenter by trade before he retired, but generally speaking, was a jack of all trades and master of none. One day, we were putting new blades on a mower out in his little shop, and I heard my grandmother calling "ROLAND! ROLAND!" (Bigdaddy's actual name). Not knowing how urgent it might be, and knowing he wore hearing aids and claimed to be hard of hearing, I assumed he didn't hear her and I told him "I hear Bigmama calling you." He said "I know" and just kept right on with the task at hand, never offering to get up to see what it was she wanted. I asked if I should go see what it was she wanted, and his exact words were "She'll let me know at dinner, so no, let's finish this job." Somehow, I don't think he really needed the hearing aids. He had his selective hearing tuned in just right. It was hard to contain myself later at the dinner table when she asked if he could hear her and why he didn't answer. I'm glad she didn't call out for me nor ask if I heard her calling for him. I do miss my Bigdaddy, and like to think that I have become him in many ways. The missus can confirm my selective hearing is getting tuned in pretty good. I've even started wearing striped overalls like him, simply because he wore them. When he passed away, unanimous decision by our generation was that he should be buried wearing a new pair of DeeCee overalls, not a suit which he only wore when Lois (our grandmother) made him wear when they went to church. Otherwise, EVERY day, he wore the DeeCee striped overalls and a white short-sleeve shirt, and that's the only thing any of us cousins can remember seeing him in.

 

[Fordtech86]