Daily Chuckle

[Magicman]

There are two kinds of politicians:

1) Those who know less and less about more and more and will soon know nothing about everything.
2) Those who know more and more about less and less and will soon know everything about nothing.

 

[Daren Todd]

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[bearbait]

Oh that was bad!

The worst of it is I've probably told 10 or 12 people that one and we all had the same reaction, a quick groan followed by a good laugh, thanks DT.

 

[Daren Todd]

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[seanbarr]

Q: What did California have before Socialism?

A: Electricity


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[sheepfarmer]

And another

 

[DThrash]

God is like calories. you can't see him but you sure can see the results.

 

[volp]

After many years of successful practice as respected gynecologist the Doctor decided to change careers. He had bought a small farm and acquired a few various animals and the older used equipment to do the work of putting up feed, harvesting etc.

Because shop time to keep his equipment operational was quite expensive he decided to enroll in a mechanics course at the local community college.

At the end of his course he completed the written portion of the exam and received a grade of 100%.

He proceeded to the shop for the practical segment of the exam and commenced to disassemble and reassemble a Kubota engine.

After several hours of meticulous work he completed the task and turned to the examination supervisor to ask for his marks. The supervisor handed him the sheet and the mark at the top was 150%!

The Doctor looked at it for a minute and then asked the examiner how it was possible to achieve such a spectacular grade.

The examiner replied; " I've watched a lot of students complete this examination practicum with resulting top marks but no one has ever done it through the muffler!

As a retired gynaecologist and Kubota owner I find this story totally believable!

 

[Magicman]

I forgot how to spell loosing. Maybe this means I'm wining.

(Looks like I also misspelled "gynaecologist".)

 

[Newlyme]

I forgot how to spell loosing. Maybe this means I'm wining.

(Looks like I also misspelled "gynaecologist".)

Thatss allright your amung goood compeny.

P.S. As long as I don’t have to go see a Gynecologist I don’t care how you spelll it.

 

[Daren Todd]

P.S. As long as I don’t have to go see a Gynecologist I don’t care how you spelll it.

I worked with some guys that should probably go see one

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[armylifer]

I worked with some guys that should probably go see one

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I didn't know that you are a politician.

 

[North Idaho Wolfman]

Son: What's in that fancy looking beer mug on the mantel?

Me: Well that's your uncle frank, That's where he wanted his remains. It was his favorite beer stein. He always said it would be funny, never got why.

Son: Maybe it's so he could be Frank In Stein?

Me: That Son of a B"""H!!!

 

[bearbait]

Irish Catholic humor

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n68bKFexRnQ

 

[Orangeglow]

The king wanted to go fishing, and he asked the royal weather
forecaster the forecast for the next few hours.The palace
meteorologist assured him that there was no chance of rain.

So the king and the queen went fishing. On the way, he met a man with
a fishing pole riding on a donkey, and he asked the man if the fish
were biting.

The fisherman said, "Your Majesty, you should return to the palace!
In just a short time I expect a huge rainstorm."

The king replied: "I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He
is an educated and experienced professional. Besides, I pay him very
high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him."

So, the king continued on his way.

However, in a short time, torrential rain fell from the sky. The King
and Queen were totally soaked.***65279;

Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire
the meteorologist.

Then he summoned the fisherman and offered him the prestigious
position of royal forecaster.

The fisherman said, "Your Majesty, I do not know anything about
forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my
donkey's ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain."

So, the king hired the donkey.

And so, began the practice of hiring dumb asses to work in influential
positions of government.

And thus, the symbol of the Democrat Party was born.

 

[Lil Foot]

So true.

 

[GeoHorn]

Whenever a lot of Elephants (Republicans) are around, the people will be trampled.

The donkey is not the Democratic party mascot. It’s a Jack Ass.
The true story of how it became their mascot revolves around Andrew Jackson, whose opponents referred to him as Andrew JackAss. He adopted the animal as the mascot of his campaign, and as the first president elected from the original Democrat party, it has remained.

Not particularly funny...but true.

 

[sawmill]

......................

 

[Daren Todd]

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[Daren Todd]

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