Daily Chuckle

[Magicman]

Letter to Men's Helpline:-

Hey Mate, really need your advice for a serious problem:

I have suspected for some time now that the missus has been cheating
The usual signs; Phone rings, if I answer the caller hangs up, going
out with the girls a lot.
I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home but I
usually fall asleep.

Anyway last night about midnight I hid in the shed behind the boat,
when she came home she got out of someone's car buttoning her blouse,
then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on... It
was at that moment crouched behind the boat, I noticed a "hairline
crack" in the outboard mounting bracket... Is that something I can
weld or do I need to replace it?

 

[Fordtech86]

 

[Magicman]

A door to door salesman was driving down a country road one day when he came upon a chicken that was really running fast. Salesman tried to pass the chicken when he noticed the chicken had 3 legs. and the chicken was keeping right up at 50 mph. Salesman speeds up to 70 and the chicken passes him and cuts off to the right up ahead so the salesman follows and comes to a farm down the road and stops. He asks the farmer if he saw a 3 legged chicken.
''Yes'' said the farmer.
''Is that your chicken?''
''Yes ''replied the farmer.
''Why does it have 3 legs?'' asked the salesman.
''Well I bred that chicken to have 3 legs'' says the farmer.
''Why would you do that?'' asked the salesman.
'' Its simple really. my wife likes the drumstick, and may son likes the drumstick and I like the drumstick. so with a 3 legged chicken we can all have a drumstick.'' replied the farmer.
''How do they taste?''asked the salesman.
'' We don't know since we haven't ever been able to catch one.'' said the farmer.

 

[Bmyers]

 

[Bmyers]

 

[Bmyers]

 

[Fordtech86]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Magicman]

First you need the proper ingredients, and then...

You can make a pot of Chicken Head Soup.

 

[dlsmith]

Apparently, ugly Christmas sweaters aren't a new thing, as this was recently dug up in North Dakota.

 

[dlsmith]

First you need the proper ingredients, and then...

You can make a pot of Chicken Head Soup.

Yeah, I think I'll pass on that.

 

[i7win7]

Saddam sent his son shopping to get some food.
His son came back with the food on his head.

So Saddam says "Why have you got the shopping on your head?"

The son replies, "Because there is no Baghdad!"

 

[i7win7]

I hate it when someone steals my username

 

[i7win7]

Tis the season for missile toad

 

[i7win7]

Makes tattoos look less painful

 

[Bmyers]

 

[Bmyers]

 

[ACDII]

 

[Magicman]

A real woman is a man's best friend. She will Never stand him up and never let him down. She will reassure him when he feels insecure and comfort him after a bad day.

She will inspire him to do things he never thought he could do; to live without fear and forget regret. She will enable him to express his deepest emotions and give in to his most intimate desires. She will make sure he always feels as though he's the most handsome man in the room and will enable him to be the most confident, sexy, seductive and invincible...

.....

.....

No wait... Sorry..

......

.....

I'm thinking of whiskey. It’s whiskey that does all that stuff.

Never mind.

 

[Toyboy]