Bob forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife, an avid NASCAR fan, was mad. She told him, “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 250 in six seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!” The next morning, she looked out the window and saw a gift-wrapped box in the driveway. She raced to open it and found a brand-new bathroom scale… Bob has been missing ever since.