Daily Chuckle
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Ask Lil Foot about his encounter with a giant hornet found in the southwest, while riding a motorcycle... it was pretty funny!
Apologies if I have misremembered who and where...maybe it was Cave Creek Ray???
Apologies if I have misremembered who and where...maybe it was Cave Creek Ray???
Lil Foot
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1979 B7100DT Gear, Nissan Hanix N150-2 Excavator
Yup, that was me. Not at all funny at the time, but pretty funny looking back.
https://www.orangetractortalks.com/forums/showthread.php?t=6612&highlight=Tarantula+hawk&page=169
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Lil Foot
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1979 B7100DT Gear, Nissan Hanix N150-2 Excavator
Truth, brother!THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT FLYING CRITTERS WHEN YOU ARE DOING 80 MPH ON 2 WHEELS,,, just sayin
I can't imagine how that could happen
our hoist has a bar and micro-switch at the top when the vehicle roof touches it -- the pump shuts off
funny picture
our hoist has a bar and micro-switch at the top when the vehicle roof touches it -- the pump shuts off
funny picture
ShaunBlake
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B6100D; B219; Piranha bar; Hodge stabilizers; Filled Ag rears; R322T w/48" deck
ewww … makes me recall the time a cigarette butt hit my leg just below the Hem of my shorts and … somehow I didn't drop it, and figured pretty quick if was entirely accidental.THERE IS NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT FLYING CRITTERS WHEN YOU ARE DOING 80 MPH ON 2 WHEELS,,, just sayin
I don't recall ever wearing shorts on a motorcycle after that. Hey, does that prove I'm not too dumb to be taught?
ShaunBlake
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B6100D; B219; Piranha bar; Hodge stabilizers; Filled Ag rears; R322T w/48" deck
The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party.
>
> The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger" ...
> "In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days."
> "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests"
> "What is your FIRST request???'
>
> The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."
>
> The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away.
>
> Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back.
>
> As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
>
> The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse", "But I will still kill you in two days."
>
> "What is your SECOND request???"
>
> The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear. As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon.
>
> Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, more attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Rangers tent and spends the night.
>
> The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed.
> "You are indeed a man of many talents," "But I will still kill you tomorrow." "What is your LAST request ???"
>
> The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse, .... alone."
>
> The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent..
>
> Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says, "Listen Very Carefully!!!!”
FOR... THE... LAST... TIME... I SAID ... "BRING POSSE"
>
> The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger" ...
> "In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days."
> "Before I kill you, I grant you three requests"
> "What is your FIRST request???'
>
> The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse."
>
> The Chief nods and Silver is brought before the Lone Ranger who whispers in Silver's ear, and the horse gallops away.
>
> Later that evening, Silver returns with a beautiful blonde woman on his back.
>
> As the Indian Chief watches, the blonde enters the Lone Ranger's tent and spends the night.
>
> The next morning the Indian Chief admits he's impressed. "You have a very fine and loyal horse", "But I will still kill you in two days."
>
> "What is your SECOND request???"
>
> The Lone Ranger again asks to speak to his horse. Silver is brought to him, and he again whispers in the horse's ear. As before, Silver takes off and disappears over the horizon.
>
> Later that evening, to the Chief's surprise, Silver again returns, this time with a voluptuous brunette, more attractive than the blonde. She enters the Lone Rangers tent and spends the night.
>
> The following morning the Indian Chief is again impressed.
> "You are indeed a man of many talents," "But I will still kill you tomorrow." "What is your LAST request ???"
>
> The Lone Ranger responds, "I'd like to speak to my horse, .... alone."
>
> The Chief is curious, but he agrees, and Silver is brought to the Lone Ranger's tent..
>
> Once they're alone, the Lone Ranger grabs Silver by both ears, looks him square in the eye and says, "Listen Very Carefully!!!!”
FOR... THE... LAST... TIME... I SAID ... "BRING POSSE"
Have you ever been guilty of looking at others your own age and thinking, surely I can’t look that old? Well . . . You’ll love this one.
My name is Alice, and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.
After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Morgan Park High School...
'Yes. Yes, I did. I'm a Mustang,” He gleamed with pride.
“When did you graduate?”' I asked.
He answered “In 1967… why do you ask?” “
“You were in my class!” I exclaimed.
He looked at me closely. Then that ugly, old, bald, wrinkle faced, fat-assed, gray haired, decrepit SOB asked me, “What did you teach?”
My name is Alice, and I was sitting in the waiting room for my first appointment with a new dentist. I noticed his DDS diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall, handsome, dark-haired boy with the same name had been in my high school class some 40-odd years ago. Could he be the same guy that I had a secret crush on, way back then? Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. This balding, gray-haired man with the deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate.
After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he had attended Morgan Park High School...
'Yes. Yes, I did. I'm a Mustang,” He gleamed with pride.
“When did you graduate?”' I asked.
He answered “In 1967… why do you ask?” “
“You were in my class!” I exclaimed.
He looked at me closely. Then that ugly, old, bald, wrinkle faced, fat-assed, gray haired, decrepit SOB asked me, “What did you teach?”
dirtydeed
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Daren Todd
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Newlyme
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May 9, 2020 This is when I knew Global Warming was BxxxSxxt! They used the same Scientific Modeling as Covid-19 Scientists!
The recession has hit everybody really hard.
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf …
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally...
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
CEO's are now playing miniature golf …
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald's is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now only worth 200 words.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally...
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call center in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.