Quotations To Live By.....

[olthumpa]

Veteran Los Angeles cop:
Seems pretty simple to me....

He forgot:
Woman: You can't touch me, I am a lady.
Cop: You stopped being a lady the moment you tried to assault me.

 

[Newlyme]

Sometimes those who claim to have an open mind really don't have an open mind at all.
It's just empty.

Anon

 

[JackJ]

I hope to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.
Not screaming in terror, like his passengers.

 

[D2Cat]

DEJA MOO....the feeling that you've heard the same bull before.

 

[Howling]

Don't be afraid of growing older.
You'll still do stupid things, only slower...

 

[D2Cat]

When you are dead, you won't even know you are dead. It's a pain felt by others.

Same thing when you are stupid.

 

[D2Cat]

Time is the best teacher, unfortunately it kills all it's students.

 

[olthumpa]

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
- By Jack Benny

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about your age.
-Lucille Ball​

 

[Newlyme]

Never wrestle with pigs. You both get dirty and the pig likes it!
George Bernard Shaw

 

[D2Cat]

If you don't pay your exorcist, do you get repossessed?

 

[Howling]

Don't take life too seriously. You will never get out alive anyway.

 

[bucktail]

Quando Omni flunkus moratati (when all else fails play dead)

possum lodge motto

 

[ehenry]

"Boy, when you get to be my age....Pee every chance you get and don't ever trust a fart"

My Grandaddy

 

[Newlyme]

I've learned....
That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

Andy Rooney

 

[Central Joe]

I have never met a person I couldn't get along with, but I have met plenty I choose not to be around. joe

 

[D2Cat]

You'll never have to explain what you don't say!

 

[Newlyme]

Life is like a roll of toilet paper.
The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

Andy Rooney

 

[Newlyme]

When you sit with a nice girl for two hours, you think it's only a minute, but when you sit on a hot stove for a minute, you think it's two hours.

That's relativity.

Albert Einstein

 

[Newlyme]

I have my doubts about this "Smart Water" considering how easily it's captured and bottled.

 

[MaleHoe]

You can't learn a thing when your mouth is moving.
~My Grandfather

“I won't be wronged. I won't be insulted. I won't be laid a-hand on. I don't do these things to other people, and I require the same from them.”
~ John Wayne in The Shootist