Daily Chuckle

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Old_Paint]

Many braille signs are posted because of the Americans With Disabilities Act. If the sign wasn't there, the company responsible for signage could be sued. Many businesses and shopping centers have been sued successfully because they didn't have the latest approved handicapped signage. At one time in my life, I managed a large shopping center, and we were changing the handicapped parking signs on a regular basis to keep up with the regulations. There were and possibly still are many people who make their livelihood by filing frivolous lawsuits.

The needs of the few…..

 

[DustyRusty]

An Arizona Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley rider for traveling faster than the posted speed limit:
He asks the old biker his name.
“Fred.” He replies.
“Fred what?” The officer asks.
“Just Fred.” The old man responds.

The officer is in a good mood, thinks he might just give the old biker a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket.
The officer then presses him for the last name.
The old man tells him that he used to have a last name, but lost it.

The officer thinks that he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it.
“Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?’
The old biker replies.
“It’s a long story, so stay with me. I was born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, and residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD.

After a while, I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to return to school. Dentistry was my dream! I got all the way through school and got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS. I got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD, so now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS, with VD.

Well, the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me as Fred Johnson with VD.

Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am Just Fred.”

The officer walked away in tears, laughing.

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[DustyRusty]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[Daylight]

 

[Magicman]

 

[Magicman]

You don't even need an actual ankle monitor. Just put your smart watch around your ankle inside out.

 

[woodman55]

Saying NO!, to their never ending requests also keeps them away.

 

[Old_Paint]

Saying NO!, to their never ending requests also keeps them away.

This is the trap I keep falling into trying to be a good neighbor.

 

[i7win7]

 

[i7win7]

 

[Magicman]

Clifford and Daisy May were married for many years.
Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. Clifford would shout, "When I die, I'll dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life ol' woman!!"
Neighbors feared him. Old Clifford liked the fact that he was feared.
He died at the ripe old age of 98.
After the burial, Daisy May's neighbors, concerned for her safety, asked, "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?"
She replied, "LET HIM DIG. I HAD HIM BURIED UPSIDE DOWN...AND I KNOW HE WON'T ASK FOR DIRECTIONS."

 

[Daren Todd]

 

[dirtydeed]

View attachment 129706

Hopefully, it was only his finger!