Daily Chuckle
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Chicken math. After building the coop and getting set up the first egg cost $250, the second one cost $125 and so on.
They don't mind the cold. Pretty hearty
Take another look. I believe that the trailer flipped over, and the wheels are on the other side of the sign.
David Page
Active member
Equipment
1974 L260, 6" bush hog, subsoiler, spring tooth harrow, boom pole, 2 bottom plow
No disrespect but some engineers may not have a reason for why they do things the way they do!
GreensvilleJay
Well-known member
Equipment
BX23-S,57 A-C D-14,58 A-C D-14, 57 A-C D-14,tiller,cults,Millcreek 25G spreader,
usually it's because they've never WORKED on what they designed......
really WHO would put a starter INSIDE an engine or a concentric throwout lever ???
at the other end , the PHD EE I worked for DID accept anything I offered, and he'd worked on the original Canadarm
Daren Todd
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
Massey Ferguson 1825E, Kubota Z121S, Box blade, Rotary Cutter
I have a list at work. Each day a new person gets added to that list.
The list is comprised solely of engineers that I would love to give a "Nut Punt" too
North Idaho Wolfman
Moderator
Staff member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
L3450DT-GST, Woods FEL, B7100 HSD, FEL, 60" SB, 743 Bobcat with V2203, and more
Well said—the power of money & bullshit.
I TOLD MY SON, "YOU WILL MARRY THE GIRL I CHOOSE."
HE SAID, "NO."
I TOLD HIM, "SHE IS BILL GATES DAUGHTER."
HE SAID, "YES."
I CALLED BILL GATES AND SAID, "I WANT YOUR DAUGHTER TO MARRY MY SON,"
BILL GATES SAID, "NO"
I TOLD BILL GATES, "MY SON IS THE C.E.O. OF THE WORLD BANK."
BILL GATES SAID, "OK"
I CALLED THE PRESIDENT OF THE WORLD BANK AND ASKED HIM TO MAKE MY SON THE C.E.O.
HE SAID, "NO"
I TOLD HIM, "MY SON IS BILL GATES SON-IN-LAW"
HE SAID, "OK"
THIS IS EXACTLY HOW POLITICS WORKS.
I TOLD MY SON, "YOU WILL MARRY THE GIRL I CHOOSE."
HE SAID, "NO."
I TOLD HIM, "SHE IS BILL GATES DAUGHTER."
HE SAID, "YES."
I CALLED BILL GATES AND SAID, "I WANT YOUR DAUGHTER TO MARRY MY SON,"
BILL GATES SAID, "NO"
I TOLD BILL GATES, "MY SON IS THE C.E.O. OF THE WORLD BANK."
BILL GATES SAID, "OK"
I CALLED THE PRESIDENT OF THE WORLD BANK AND ASKED HIM TO MAKE MY SON THE C.E.O.
HE SAID, "NO"
I TOLD HIM, "MY SON IS BILL GATES SON-IN-LAW"
HE SAID, "OK"
THIS IS EXACTLY HOW POLITICS WORKS.
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An Engineer dies and goes to Hell. Dissatisfied with the level of comfort, he starts designing and building improvements.
After a while, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One day God calls and asks Satan, "So, how's it going down there?" Satan says, "Hey things are going great.
We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."
God is horrified. "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake - he should never have gone down there!
You know all engineers go to Heaven. Send him up here! "
Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff. I'm keeping him."
God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."
"Yeah, right," Satan laughs, "and where are you going to get a lawyer?"
After a while, Hell has air conditioning, flush toilets, and escalators. The engineer is a pretty popular guy.
One day God calls and asks Satan, "So, how's it going down there?" Satan says, "Hey things are going great.
We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."
God is horrified. "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake - he should never have gone down there!
You know all engineers go to Heaven. Send him up here! "
Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff. I'm keeping him."
God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue."
"Yeah, right," Satan laughs, "and where are you going to get a lawyer?"
My Neighbor!
She's single... She lives right across the street. I can see her place from my kitchen window.
I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway, and knocked on the door.
I opened the door, she looked at me and said, "I just got home, and I have this strong urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and make mad, passionate love. Are you doing anything?"
I quickly replied, "Nope, I'm free!"
"Great," she said. "Can you watch my dog?"
Being a senior citizen really sucks!!!
She's single... She lives right across the street. I can see her place from my kitchen window.
I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway, and knocked on the door.
I opened the door, she looked at me and said, "I just got home, and I have this strong urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and make mad, passionate love. Are you doing anything?"
I quickly replied, "Nope, I'm free!"
"Great," she said. "Can you watch my dog?"
Being a senior citizen really sucks!!!
An atheist was seated next to a little girl on an airplane and he turned
to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike
up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total
stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why there is no God,
or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?" as he smiled smugly.
"Okay," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask
you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same
stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns
out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence,
thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which
the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss
God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don't know shit?"
And then she went back to reading her book.
to her and said, "Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike
up a conversation with your fellow passenger."
The little girl, who had just started to read her book, replied to the total
stranger, "What would you want to talk about?"
"Oh, I don't know," said the atheist. "How about why there is no God,
or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?" as he smiled smugly.
"Okay," she said. "Those could be interesting topics but let me ask
you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same
stuff - grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns
out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?"
The atheist, visibly surprised by the little girl's intelligence,
thinks about it and says, "Hmmm, I have no idea." To which
the little girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to discuss
God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don't know shit?"
And then she went back to reading her book.
airbiscuit
Active member
Equipment
New Holland T2310, New Holland TC21D, Kubota l3010 GST, Farmall H
GreensvilleJay
Well-known member
Equipment
BX23-S,57 A-C D-14,58 A-C D-14, 57 A-C D-14,tiller,cults,Millcreek 25G spreader,
Magicman
Well-known member
Lifetime Member
Equipment
M4900 Utility Special 4WD e/w FEL & 1530 John Deere "Traveling Man"
A man goes to see the Rabbi. "Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it."
The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?"
The man replied, "My wife is poisoning me."
The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?"
The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me. What should I do?"
The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her. I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."
A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says. "I called your wife and spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?"
The man said yes, and the Rabbi replied, "Take the poison!"
The Rabbi asked, "What's wrong?"
The man replied, "My wife is poisoning me."
The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, "How can that be?"
The man then pleads, "I'm telling you, I'm certain she's poisoning me. What should I do?"
The Rabbi then offers, "Tell you what. Let me talk to her. I'll see what I can find out and I'll let you know."
A week later the Rabbi calls the man and says. "I called your wife and spoke to her on the phone for three hours. You want my advice?"
The man said yes, and the Rabbi replied, "Take the poison!"