A question for the gray beards

[skeets]

Guys I do have a question of life I guess. Have you ever woke up and looked around and asked your self about your living style. What I mean, and I am talking about us gray beards, just packing it in. Sell the whole nine yards, bike, tractors, house and everything in it, get in the truck and ride off into the sunset looking for some place. A small place where you can be comfortable, and not have to worry about mowing grass, and snow removal, house maintenance cleaning up fallen trees and stuff. These things never crossed my mind before. I figured they would find my rotting corps on the tractor some place over the hill in the woods or in the orchard, and thought that would be OK.
I dont know, this morning the thought is nagging me, what made this place a home is gone, and the clan seems to have forgotten you are alive.
Sorry , if I sound like an old guy, just had to vent

 

[bearbait]

Kinda did that last year mainly because where we were living wasn't gonna cut it for much longer. All I can say is think long and hard before you decide anything. Our move was far from easy and not even close to being stress free. Yes the work load will be much less soon, still in the country, only 10 minutes to whatever we need but I sure miss my old place and probably always will. Take lot's of time to really think it over good and good luck with your decision.

 

[ayak]

I hear Zihuatanejo is nice this time of year. Lots of boats washed up on beaches, needing fixed up (no fishing tackle to be found onboard, though ).

 

[JimmyJazz]

I think about it daily.

 

[Yooper]

Had a cousin that did just that. Her and the hubby bought a motor home and drove around the country and hung out in different places until they got bored and moved on. Sorry, not for me. I need my man cave and machines to be happy

 

[m-m-m-myKubota]

I sometimes have fantasies about living some other life. I imagine there are so many people who fantasize about mine!

i'm coming to the conclusion - sometimes it's about me, and sometimes I'm just the actor on someone else's stage. I've suffered losses that I wish on nobody. I've also made some selfish and stupid (in hindsight of course) choices and actions that I now have to put into that context - sometimes it's about me, sometimes not. God will sort that out and I'm okay with any penalties I've accrued.

 

[GreensvilleJay]

yeah 'downsizing'.....
been trying to squeeze 4200 sq ft of small 'stuff' into a 2 car garage, sold/given away 7 trailers,4 tractors, 9 riders,sawmill and the combine ( no real 'need' for the combine on a 1/3rd of an acre I suppose).
been in the house for 37 years (over 1/2 my life), have plans to live on 1st floor with live in 'personal support worker'..she gets 2nd floor. have lots of nice neighbours who can do 'chores' as needed

 

[Code]

Im just about to retire and tbh Im the opposite. I only have 25acres and want a bigger place. I spent summers at grandpas 500acre horse/cattle farm so i dont even consider my property more than a big yard. I spent my life in tech chasing the dollar and regret waiting so long to get my farm.

 

[rkidd]

Had a cousin that did just that. Her and the hubby bought a motor home and drove around the country and hung out in different places until they got bored and moved on. Sorry, not for me. I need my man cave and machines to be happy

Hey Yooper. Been a while. Same for me. Love my house and my tractor and equipment and boat which I never thought I would own! I also live in my shop all winter long tinkering with things!

 

[The_Wingnut]

Skeets, I feel your pain.... so many days when I'm walking to my shed, to work on the daily chores, I see fellas go by my place, on the way to the river, with their boat in tow and I think "what am I doing wrong?".

Last year really hit me hard, the COVID thing, kept family away, couldn't travel and get away, just a strain on the senses. As the grey has taken firm root I now often consider downsizing and how stress free things could be. Then I make my way to the shed crawl on the Kubota and mow the pasture, cut some firewood, grade the drive, mend the fence, takes me to a different mindset and I realize without the daily requirements of my current lifestyle how happy would I really be?. As you said "I figured they would find my rotting corps on the tractor some place over the hill in the woods or in the orchard" you know that's not too bad of a way to leave, a peaceful departure riding the tractor!!!

Until that day comes live your life to the fullest if downsizing is what works for you go for it....best of luck in your decision!

 

[Fladogman]

I too think about this now that our little town has grown up. What once was the countryside is quickly becoming the edge of town. I'm not sure I still have the energy and drive to start over again.

 

[Biker1mike]

Raising a grandkid in high school with three other grandkids 2 hours north and aging mother in law a hour south. No way the wife will leave this area for some time. I am always ready to move on.
Sometimes life has been great and some times it just sucked.
I have lost friends and family to health issues, accidents, stupidity, and war. I try to stay optimistic as I am still here.

 

[William1]

I try to be realistic. I know at some point, I'll not be able to rake care of my place. Before all the paint peels, 'that smell' develops and the weeds over take, I'll move to assisted living.
Not sure how I'll dispose of all the crap I've accumulated. I have been giving away a lot and only retain things I do or may use. No non-functioning stuff. None of my family is interested in the same things I am. I suppose I'll take what I want to my new place and have an 'Estate Auction' and not look back.

 

[Code]

its a weird thing with me. I am at my most relaxed working the chores on my place. When im “paying the bills” all i think about is being in the shop or on the tractor. Im guessing whats fullfilling to me has changed as i Aquired my greybeard. Will i slow down? Some sure but my dad is 80 and still works his farm daily. He and i am the same mindset of if i die out working my land then ive had a good run. Helps haveing a partner thats 6 years younger and loves the outside too. Hell she did the zeroturn 100hr this week.

 

[jimh406]

Do what makes you happy as long as you aren't giving everything away, you probably could switch back in the future. There are steps you can take to reduce the daily/weekly maintenance.

I think the reason snow birding is fairly popular is that people like living differently some part of the year. You could try living in small space by renting an RV for a week or two and see what you think.

Another thought is go searching for a new hobby/volunteer/job that gives you more time to interact with people.

I didn't intend it but went bigger when I retired a few years ago. I lived on a lot in a larger town, but now live outside even a small city on 130 acres with a house twice the size.

 

[ctfjr]

We are also facing 'downsizing'. It has been pretty stressful so far.
First to get the house ready to list we had to:
repaint outside
touchup all interior trim and damaged walls
fix everything that was broken
cleanup all all landscaping (my hobby project with the tractor)
get rid of 34 yrs of accumulated 'stuff'
get a 'stager' in to make 'look pretty'

We are about ready to list within the next 2 weeks and have started looking for a new place. That turned out to be really depressing - low inventory and high prices

 

[Henro]

Just remember that some decisions we make in life we cannot change later.

If you make a good one, that's great.

If you make one that you regret later and cannot recover from, you will live with it the rest of your life.

My beard is mostly gray, so I qualify to respond to the question, but my hair is still mostly black...might be a few gray hairs in there but not too many. No complaints at 75.

 

[aaluck]

dont know, this morning the thought is nagging me, what made this place a home is gone, and the clan seems to have forgotten you are alive.

We all feel this way sometimes. Usually it passes--sometimes it doesn't. If it doesn't your decision will be made for you.

In 2020 both our children were off in college. Covid hit and the schools were shut down so both returned home. It was uncomfortable, having four folks used to 'doing their own thing' now back in the same house. Then in 2021 we almost lost our daughter and everything changed. All of a sudden what used to seem important no longer was. My entire perspective and outlook on life changed.

My point is, sometimes life (for me God) changes your perspective for a reason. You may not understand the reason, or maybe your not meant to understand it.

Sometimes we make change and sometimes its made for us.

 

[D2Cat]

Most things in life are relative. Disposing of most all material possessions may sound like a simple answer to make life easier, less stressed, more carefree. But not necessarily. You only create a new batch of circumstances and challenges.

Typically the things that cause you to question the worthiness of an activity are the things that keep you moving and alive. You get rid of them and you die quicker.

 

[Code]

My grandad always said he would rest when hes dead. And coupled that with the same idea that if he stopped hed diew in 6montha max. It kept him alert and one of the strongest men ive every known physically my dad is same and thanfully that passed to me.
Everyone idea of whats relaxing. Physical farm work relaxes me and helps me sleep better.

If i can offer any advice it would be to take some time and figure out what you want to do. What makes you happy? Really have a think about it. And make the changes you can to get there

Most things in life are relative. Disposing of most all material possessions may sound like a simple answer to make life easier, less stressed, more carefree. But not necessarily. You only create a new batch of circumstances and challenges.

Typically the things that cause you to question the worthiness of an activity are the things that keep you moving and alive. You get rid of them and you die quicker.